It’s been a while since I did a good rant and frankly, I could not help myself after seeing what is easily the world’s ugliest creation in footwear history. As someone that is trying to see men wearing better shoes, monstrosities such as these only serve to make my life harder. And it would appear that year after year, one of the big sports shoe brands is trying to one-up the other by making an even uglier shoe than the previous. Last year it was one of Adidas’ x Yeezy amoeba-looking shoes, and now this seashell x soccer shoe that looks like it comes from some planet in a far-off galaxy. I am already dreading what 2024 will bring!
This was a collaboration between Botter x Reebok x HP to make the half seashell / half soccer cleat platform sneaker that is 3D printed by HP. I like when brands get together, but I mean, are they just taking the piss with these? There is no functionality-serving purpose with these and it is quite unfathomable that someone would find these attractive. Of course, as I say that, I recall actually spotting someone in Soho wearing a pair the other day. Not sure if they were paid to do so as they simply don’t seem real or look natural. Looking at them makes me feel like I am watching some sci-fi fantasy movie set in the year 3034 in the galaxy of Seashellonia where alien creatures have commandeered the feet of the locals as a parasitical attack.
While nothing surprises me anymore, I just ask myself ‘why’? Why must fashion try so hard to just be ridiculous? It’s not even mind-boggling anymore, it’s just sad. Where did taste go?
Sometimes, I wish these brands would just say no. I love Reebok. I have like 5 pairs of the classics. And feel that they come from a good heritage. The founder would be rolling in his grave for sure if he saw these. I guess integrity has gone out the door in exchange for power and money. And this is what is created because of that. But what is even crazier is the fact that people will probably wear these. And ultimately that is what blows my mind the most. Where has the world gone?!
All images courtesy of Reebok
Bruce
Looks like they started with the theme of ‘grandma’ slippers and then had too many glasses of wine. Tragic use of a mold.
Noah Atticus Holmes
Those are cool and creative. Keep recycling your jordan 1s and continue to consider novel and creative designs as “ugly”
Justin FitzPatrick
hahahaha
Charlie
hope ur joking, looks like my 4 yr old son drawing, it’s a really tight race between yeezy and rebook on this one … i mean wow, i never believed that someone would create something this ugly, let alone someone else buying this things cannot even call them shoes.
Juan Manuel
You said It… No more integrity, just money. So sad…
Justin FitzPatrick
yup, year after year it gets worse and worse
Justin FitzPatrick
😉
Peter Harrison
I’m speechless. (I do miss your rants, though.)
Justin FitzPatrick
will see if I can bring them back 😉
KAMIL
I’m waiting for the first soccer player to wear this on the red carpet with a black tie ensemble, shiny dinner jacket & sport watch in a price range of my car to my house 🙂
Justin FitzPatrick
exactly, it will come soon
Marcus
The difference between style and fashion is that style will last a lot longer than fashion; fashion is used to discredit what you already have so you can go out and buy something new. (Andrew Ramroop, Tailor)
By the way: The only time in my more than 50 year a woman on the street complimented me on my shoes, i was wearing a pair of Justins Blue Ridge button boots.
Will not happen with these kind of “sneakers”.
Justin FitzPatrick
Thank you for sharing Marcus and I love to hear that! That makes me happy to know.
Taino
The emperor has no clothes…you can sell a Pendejo anything!
Justin FitzPatrick
hahahaha, 100% 😉
Michael A Moss
be sure you get the sign that go with the shoes. it says, I LOVE ATTENTION.
Justin FitzPatrick
exactly
Philippe De Montauvant
Let’s call this an exercise that deserves a British adjective: interesting! 😉
Justin FitzPatrick
I think you are being generous 😉
gio
When is this shoes coming out because i was hoping to see them in real life and i want to feel them and wear them how they feel. :V
Jordan
I encourage you to look into the history of this shape. Before you dismiss it based on looks. Its a maximalist rocker sports shoe. The first time I recall seeing it “well done” was Nike Breaking 2hr marathon project, great National Geographic documentary, btw..
Innovation of this shape is pushing the envelope of maximalist sports shoes. I have many Nike Alphafly and Adidas Pro shoes in this shape. These appear to be rebook and yeeze, however most sports shoe brands have a model in this silhouette. The shoes utilize carbon fiber, light weight responsive foams, and other technology. The reebok Floatride Run Fast Pro shoe demonstrated even a small venier of these foams makes a difference and now they incorporate the foams in track spikes. Running shoe technology in general has really exploded in the last 5 or so years. That same thin layer of foam in a high end sneaker brogue or even the insole or liner padding makes a shoe incredibly comfortable. I have several zoomX insoles. Anyway, check it out..
Justin FitzPatrick
Jordan, while I appreciate your comment and insights, the point of the post was the look, not its history. Its history won’t change how i feel about them anyway so it is still irrelavent.